Wednesday, 28 November 2012

Oye fat people out there, you have nothing to lose other than your weight (with apologies to Marx)

I have been meaning to write this  post right from the day I read this post of  Sugar's. Thank you Sugar for spurring my thoughts.  I just noticed that It has taken me over a month to put this up.
 I have always been fat except for a few months more than ten years ago. I have been called nicknames in school and college, teased mercilessly by sundry uncles who knew no better and shouted at by family members for taking that extra portion of ice cream/gulab jamun/biriyani/mysore pak.Sometimes the reprimands have been totally out of the blue, after one of them read an online article on the dangers associated with obesity (as if I am clueless about that).  I used to love acting, but  felt that I was almost always cast in  older lady roles in school plays because I could easily turn into an older lady with some chalk powder on my hair and a white saree.   I stopped going for college/school reunions because the over-weight me has turned into an obese me. Sometime ago when my self-esteem was at its lowest, I stopped posing for photos. Suffice to say, I have always felt terribly guilty for being overweight. Weight is not just the extra kilos I am (physically) carrying, but also the heavy mental burden that weighs me down. That is why I strongly believe that weight loss is also about hard mental work.

Most over-weight people know they have a problem. THEY DO NOT NEED UNSOLICITED ADVICE/COMMENTS ON THEIR WEIGHT. When I was a little girl, one of the things a wise aunt told me was this - if you can't say something good, keep your mouth shut. Of course, this is not an absolute rule, but it is squarely applicable in this case.

One of the things this journey with the extra weight has helped me achieve is a thicker skin. I used to be terribly sensitive, breaking into tears at cruel comments/'jokes".  Now, the older wiser me is able to shrug away such comments and move on. Over the years, I have learned to distinguish between genuine concern and pure malice.  I have come to understand that my immediate family members are genuinely concerned about my booming waistline, especially given the history of diabetics and hypertension in our family and this concern is reflected in angry remarks. But I also know when there is no concern, but only viciousness. Why would uncle "X"  (who has no investment in my well-being) make that snarky comment about my weight in public? Whoever said "God gave us our relatives, thank God we can choose our friends" is so bloody right:-)))
None of us are perfect.  For us fat people, the extra weight hanging out makes this simple truth all the more evident. But, this is not to mean that we give up attempting to be perfect (in our case, losing that weight, becoming fit, reducing chances of lifestyle diseases etc). On that note, I should perhaps say that my weight loss is going well. I am now 78.3 kgs. I consider this an achievement, given that I gained weight after moving here. But I shall not rest on my laurels. I totally mean to keep going.....

Tuesday, 6 November 2012

Something is better than nothing

On Sunday I checked my weight again and it showed a measly 200 gm loss. My weight stands at 80.3 kgs.  But I want to remind myself that


I think I know why there was no dramatic weight loss despite being good with exercise and eating carefully during the week. I had a heavy dinner on Thursday night (the last day of the work week here) because I did not have healthy snacks in the evening. On Saturday morning, I saw  delicious looking  uzhunnu vadas in the supermarket and they were singing my name, so of course, moi had to buy them and eat not just one, but the half of a second one as well. Lunch was ghee rice (neyychoru) and chicken curry with a greasy gravy  on Friday and Saturday. I know very well  I should not be eating rice cooked in fat, especially when I did not measure it. On my good days, I eat only 1/2 a cup of rice with salad and sambhar cooked in minimal oil for lunch. Again, it was poor planning that led me to eat the ghee rice. If I had planned healthy lunch options, this would not have happened. 

I have also realised that the 30 minute Leslie Sansone indoor sessions are not intensive enough for me, especially when I do not perform the kicks, kickbacks and knee lifts, though I have to add that the 45 minutes version helped me lose weight.  The realisation came when I started walking in the park at a reasonably fast pace. I love listening to music while walking. I find my walk at the park a lot more intensive than the Leslie Sansone tapes. I also find myself thinking and planning my day during my walk and feel so good and energized after the walk. So, I thank God for this park with its excellent jogging track (with even measurements laid down in 50 meter intervals to track the distance, how good is that?). I also try to walk in the evening, but sometimes other commitments can come in the way of this walk, so I have decided that my morning walk is non-negotiable, just like brushing my teeth or taking a bath or having coffee.